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Yesterday was one of the most beautiful days ever. Yes, a little too warm to be perfect, but I'm not complaining - hot is good, too (it was in the low 80's)! After missing class, I got dressed and went outside to take some photos with my digital camera, and then do some reading on top of the campus store. It was nice to be outside. Then I actually went to my other class (last one I'm going to this semester, so ever) and then home. And poker!
Except I lost $20 in poker last night, which annoys me. Normally, I don't get annoyed about losing money there, but I know that the reason I lost money last night was because I wasn't concentrating on the game. Why you say, was I not concentrating on the game? Stupid fraternity stuff. There was an incident that got blown way out of proportion in regards to the actual incident itself, but it bothers me that no one saw something like this coming, what with all the bad blood that's been breeding all semester long. A semester of nothing but people accusing each other of being the one's to blame with no one taking responsibility has resulted in several angry brothers, at least one very frustrated and concerned eboard member and a ruined game. I would really like to see the semester, my last here, end on a high note between my friends and brothers, since the end of the semester is supposed to be a fun time for everyone, and it's been a rough semester for me, with the only saving grace being my friends. But I'm tired of feeling guilty and judged about who I choose to hang out with, and that shouldn't happen when everyone's supposed to be friends.
On another note, I have to miss my last slope day. I have an interview for a job in NYC next Friday - I most likely won't take the job, but I couldn't turn down the interview, nor could I schedule for a different day. Since I have to drive to the city, I'll get together with as many friends as I can, and mostly bring Demetri back to Ithaca for the weekend's festivities (minus the drinking on the slope thing). It'll be good to see some people.
I'm getting a little frustrated about the future thing. I know what I want to do, and I've made up my mind, even if I keep telling people I'll keep my options open. They really are, I just don't think they'll be necessary. When I tell everyone what I'm doing and why, I can tell by their response that they aren't listening to me and that where they think I should live and what I should do with my future is so totally tainted by where they live. People from Illinois want me to go back to Illinois, people in Buffalo want me to move there, people in NYC want me to move to NYC and of course, people in Boston want me to move to Boston (no, they are not exempt from this). I can't make myself get excited about jobs outside of Boston. I don't know how I've made it far enough to have at least one, possibly another, site interview next week, for jobs that I know are not what I want. My instincts tell me that I need to go to Boston this summer, and I need to establish my life.
I'm finishing up the analysis on my project today. No more analysis! Now just compiling information and writing. I can't believe it's almost done! There will also be bbq and movie goodness tonight, which is exciting. And DEFINITELY applying to Boston jobs tomorrow. I'm going to make this happen.
- Lizzardie, at 11:11 AM
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