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All right, so last night I was ready to write everyone off and just go to bed feeling sorry for myself. And then I got the IM I was dreading, and I just wanted to make it go away. But you know what? It wasn't bad at all. In fact, it was good. Instead of having my feelings and issues written off for the sake of someone else's, I got some attention. I got to talk about some things and questions were asked and no one tried to solve my problems for me. I was just reminded that I can be stronger and that I've even said that I want to be. How is it that everyone time I think I've had enough of something, I come to find that it's all been in my head. I got just what I wanted and needed last night and even what I had been ranting about here for, and by the time I went to bed (which was around 6:30am, surprise, surprise), I wasn't even in a bad mood anymore. Sometimes I'm amazed at how even though there are a lot of things that I want and even need sometimes, I'm never as alone as I think I am. I guess that in that way, I'm pretty lucky.
Nothing has changed. I still have no money and my car is still hurting and my bracelet is still broken. My project is still going tediously slow. But despite the few hours of sleep I got this morning (I had to be at work on the project at 11:30am), today hasn't been so bad.
- Lizzardie, at 7:08 PM
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