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"No good deed goes unpunished." I try not to live my life by this pessimistic outlook. I like to think that when I make an effort to do something to benefit other people that it will not be looked upon poorly. It makes me feel good to know that I'm making a positive difference in other people's lives. Lately, though, I really don't think my efforts to do so are succeeding. It's been a long time since I've felt taken advantage of, but that feeling is coming back to me. Half of my time is spent running around like a mad woman, not for me, but for the benefit of other people. And not only do I feel like I'm being walked over, I also feel as if some people wished I wasn't making the effort. Negative effects should not come out of good intentions. Because I do have good intentions. I want to bring a smile to someone's face, everyday. But today and yesterday and other days, well, I just feel like a nuisance. I really hope I'm not. It would just add to the evidence building up that everything I've strived for in the last couple years has been lost. And I've worked so hard - I don't want it to be for nothing.
- Lizzardie, at 12:11 AM
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