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There's a $52 withdrawal pending on my checking account, which concerns me. I haven't made any withdrawals today or yesterday, and none of my outstanding checks are for that much. Argh...I hate when this happens - I start getting all paranoid that I left something where I shouldn't have (which I do ALL the time - I can be so absent-minded) and that it's come back to bite me in the ass. At least today is payday, although once again, I have mucho bills to pay. *sigh*
I hate Daylights Savings Time, by the way. Granted, it's nice that it's light out in the morning again - and I can use my sunglasses, woohoo, but I don't like that it's pitch black out at 5:30pm when I leave work - it's so depressing. Or, maybe it's that I hate leaving at 5:30. Soon, though, I'll have all the time made up for the days I'm taking off in order to go to St. Louis with the frat, and I can go back to leaving a little later (after 7:00am, perhaps? this reminds me of high school) and leaving at or before 5:00pm. That will still be a few weeks, and by that time it'll be pitch black at 5:00pm and I will basically be trapped inside for the entire part of the day where there's sunlight. No wonder winter depresses me.
So....I'm spending my morning with more statistics. Yippee! Or not.... Really, I shouldn't complain, since my major is about half statistics and therefore, I should be thrilled to apply it. Right? Wrong. It's so, so dull. I'm just doing the same thing over and over and over and over...(you get the idea) again. And you know what? In the almost two months that I've been working on this project, we have learned nothing since the first week. Absolutely nothing. We get new data and it just fits in with the old data. Basically, we can raise our rates as much as we want and our customers won't complain, that's our conclusion (which doesn't give me much faith in the intelligence of the world, but that's besides the point). It frustrates me to no end that this is what I spend my days doing (when I'm not on IM or sleeping or working on my webpage....). I'm worried that for the second time, I chose the wrong major. Am I ever going to find something that's challenging and rewarding at the same time? I want to look back and see that I've made a difference, at least somehow. I may not be out to save the world, but brightening someone's day would certainly satisfy me. Hell, brightening MY day would satisfy me. Instead, I sit doing work that I consider completely mindless. I want my work to require some thought, to make me use what I know to learn more. I've never had a job that's done that and I wonder if I ever will. I don't want to spend the rest of my life at jobs like this, where I start my countdown to Friday the minute I get to work on Monday. That's not a life at all, so I sure as hell don't want to make it mine.
*sigh* No use complaining right now, though, I suppose. Back to my number crunching....
- Lizzardie, at 9:59 AM
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